i have another essay due in four days, so my head is full of social dynamics and accessibility and the deprivation index and decile funding, and various socioeconomic factors which directly affect educational opportunity, and choice or lack of it, and Beeby and Dewey and Thrupp, and even Pierre Bourdieu - but it occured to me as i sat in my social issues lecture this arvo/evening (yeah, four hour lecture, oh joy) that this culture shock is slowly starting to ebb and i am finding the readings far less dense and frightening and mystical than i initially did, and i am finally beginning to assimilate all these Big Words into my consciousness.
the weight that i continue to lose is kinda shocking though - i'm now a kilo less than i was at a rather slender nineteen - although the chub seems to have been redistributed to different places lol. memo to self - e.a.t.
when Bulldog came to pick me up after my lecture tonight, he played me this song, and held my hand as we drove along the expressway, and i blinked back tears as our journey flashed past like the blinking lights from warm lounges and street corners and the words echoed around and around as i thought about the new *coming alive* for us this year - connecting in the sphere of academia - i am loving tripping inside all this history and politics and thinking deeply about the world of our nation's children, and sharing all of it with the person i love as much as any in the world.
still i try to find my way, spending hours, endin' days, burnin' like a flame behind my eyes. drown it out, drink it in. i lay there in the dark, i close my eyes.
you saved me the day you came alive.