On the Fourteenth Day of Christmas

(ooo lookit - katie's *Christmas giveaway* is here!)

today we transformed these

into this
evah-so-sexy
Christmas Torte

*S-T-O-P!!!* DON'T PANIC!!!
it's totally waist-friendly
cos it's mostly *air*!!!

*whispers to all the kiwi-peeps*
it's just two pav's stacked together masquerading as a
CHRISTMAS TORTE!!!

i love making pavlovas - it's so easy peasy - cos ya do it in ten minute increments.
ya need:
EGGS, SUGAR, CREAM, STRAWBERRIES, DARK CHOCOLATE.
c'est tout!!!!! (that's all!!!)

THE FIRST TEN MINS =
1. preheat oven to 180 celsius. grab two bowls. separate ten eggies (make sure they're at room temperature - way easier to separate and also you can beat more air into them, or something like that) and pop five whites into each bowl (save the yolks for the local yolk-els' lunch or something. ha! yokels YOLKels - i crack myself up!).

2. with your electric mixer, beat each bowl of egg whites to soft peaks and fling in a cup of white sugar to each, madly beating all the time for about five minutes each bowl. (you're supposed to add the sugar a tablespoonful at a time - but i add it in half-cup lots - ha!)

3. ever-so-gently (without banging the beaters down on the side of the bowl to dislodge the glossy egg mixture - use your spare hand instead - otherwise ya bang out all the air you've been painstakingly beating INTO it for the last five minutes lol) spoon each bowlful into circles on a baking-paper-lined oven tray.

THE SECOND TEN MINS =
4. bake ten mins at 180 celsius (to seal the pavlova crust) and TURN DOWN OVEN to 150 fan bake for AN HOUR. do not open oven door at any stage. cool in oven with the door closed. noddle off and lie in the sunshine in your bikini - uh - with sunscreen on.

THE THIRD TEN MINS =
5. grab three ridiculously-priced punnets of strawberries - dip some in melted dark chocolate. you can use white chocolate confectionery (you can't call that stuff "chocolate" because we all know that "chocolate" is BROWN) if you really like - it looks all snowy!

6. the fun part - whip 500 ml cream - spread half on one heavenly-circle and pile with chopped berries, stack the other heavenly-circle and spread the rest of the cream on the top. arrange the most beautiful berries on the cream, and lastly sprinkle the chocolate dipped strawbs on the tippy tippy top.
give it THE BIG CHILL in the fridge.

THE FOURTH TEN MINS =
7. juggle it in the car all the way to the Christmas Party!

*** be slightly aware that even though the evah-so-sexy Christmas Torte is totally full of *air* and therefore totally waist-friendly, it will probably take a little less than TEN MINS to eat***