and life in our own house suddenly seems too loud. i'm finding myself seeking solace in nutty things like ironing. which is a crazy statement in itself. i adore these peeps i'm walking with. our usual vibe is being dampened by my exhaustion. the weekend arrives and i just wanna crawl into a cave.
we did escape to the beach yesterday. me'n' my five kiddos, on danny's last holiday day with us. everyone spread out and went adventuring, jumping off rocks and clinging to cliffs above the crashing surf. my heart stopped once or twice. but it did put the ensuing exams into perspective, for an hour.
so i'm thinking about the possibility of pursuing a full time job next year, or not: will one lot of kiddos and one classroom be easier than four (or fourteen some weeks)? can i really be true to my hippie self (yeah, the kids are still asking)? will i have some niceness left over for my own beautiful people, or will it all get sucked out by some passing dementor?